Relocate With Jen: June 2009

 A few days ago I woke up to find a large burst blister on my shoulder.  Honestly I didn't think much of it - I am klutz, it wasn't until the blister started to look like a used ashtray that I was concerned.   I went to the North Raleigh Walk in Clinic and was immediately seen.  It turns out I was bitten by a poisonous spider a small brown spider with pastel blue markings had done all this damage.

North Carolina is also the home of the Brown Recluse Spider & Black Widows.   The MO of a Brown Recluse is to numb the victim first and then bite -this explains why I don't remember being bit.  He showed me pictures of wounds & spiders and ultimately sent me to my dermatologist.  There is no avoiding what is becoming a poker chip sized scar.

Very well bandaged and worried about the impending scar,   I went to a friend's restaurant.   I needed some relaxation.  It's a decently busy neighborhood restaurant with tons of locals.    Waiters are taking orders and in the distance you can hear the shake of martini's being made.  A younger couple, I recognize but don't know by name were relaxing at corner table.  When the man just slumped over, it seemed like time started moving very slowly.  A man yelled Call 911.   I found myself talking to a 911 dispatcher as other patrons tried to wake up and evaluate the passed out man.  This man, 5 minutes earlier was laughing with his wife and listening to the waiter recite specials-- now he had not color in his face. Quickly, First Responders arrived -a fire truck and ambulance.  The man was talking and walking but still very pale ultimately taken to Wake Med North.  

Bad day - Yeah Right.   My spider bite is nothing compared to this man's evening or the obvious stress & worry his wife must now be enduring.   The next time you think you are having a bad day - relax and remember it could be worse.  If you see an EMT or other emergency professionals STOP shake their hand and says "THANKS".  Recognize them for jumping in no questions asked through to rescue us from our really bad days.

This is a great one for both buyers, sellers and real estate agents to read!!!  

My first 8000 Tax Credit post has received overwhelming interest.  Thank you for all of you feedback and questions -- I have been reading government and state site to find accurate information -- not opinions.

How to use the tax credit prior to closing? Unfortunately the news is not wonderful!!

1. Hud writes very confusing and very general statement --typical of a governmental office
2. HUD needs to be general since many of the programs are a state by state not national 
3. Please click the PDF link below to read HUD's statement from May 29th, 2009

New Facts

•  FHA still requires that the 3.5% be the Buyers money.
•  HUD stated Tax Credit Money can be used as additional down payment funds. 
• Hud stated it can be used to assist with closing costs
• It is can be considered additional financing, a soft second or loan. 
• It is not an advance with no strings
• If buyer owes taxes, child support or is garnished they may not recieve all $8000. 
• Re-file your taxes with Amendment and receive Tax Credit early
• IF you filed Tax Extension - close and include Form 5405 you can receive money early.

The nutshell is HUD implied that the money can be used in advance to closing but the IRS does not stipulate how to use it - and parts of www.IRS.org flat out says NO.

The best site I have found is the National Council of State Housing Agencies (NCSHA). There is tons of information in plain english.  Save this site http://www.ncsha.org/

Most importantly the NCSHA site details exactly what the American Recovery and Reinvestment Act of 2009 is and provides links to state based programs to help buyers.   I am disappointed that North Carolina was not listed.

The Bad NEWS:

Based on what I have read. -- There is no concrete or official process to use the Tax Credit money prior to closing in North Carolina nor have I found a state that is regularly provides this to Buyers.  My biggest concern is the IRS site flat out states "The credit may not be claimed before the closing date".  The IRS provides no directions, exceptions or situations to use the Tax Credit prior to closing.

Read  Form 5405which is used to file for the $8000 Tax Credit. This form is mentioned numerous times in HUD's statement. Form 5405 is very specific and nowhere does explain how to use it prior to closing. Below is the First Time Home Buyer Section of the www.IRS.gov. This morning I email customer service at the IRS to be told how to do this-- I tried to call but could not wait that long.

Definitely another link to save.  http://www.irs.gov/newsroom/article/0,,id=204671,00.html?portlet7.

June 16^th 2009 my husband, Rusty and I will be married one whole year.

 Many people have told us how tough marriage can be-No one told me that we would completely lose our minds once we said "I do".  My parents have been married 38 years.  This past Memorial Day my Mom told me that she could not be paid enough to live the first 10 years of her marriage once again.  She said "If you expect to be happy everyday, all the time and agree always that you need to WAKE UP and be real."Overall we are happy and I look forward to spending a life time with my husband. But, like most we have hit a lot of pot holes and detours in our short road together.

Our biggest battle thus far has been buying a home; the money, getting a loan, picking a house - you name it we battled about it.  It has been stressful on so many levels. Imagine being a newlywed and buying a home is our first "BIG" decision "TOGETHER".  Add to that the stress of being the Realtor for my husband while trying to learn how to be a wife and my Husband is a first time home buyer with new wife that is a relatively new real estate agent.  The kicker is both parties our well educated, vocal, opinionated(aka Control Freaks) -Oh by the way, money is generally a touchy subject for us.

Words like "needs a little work", "it's a good buy", "and the drive is not bad" are so subjective. My concept and his concept are so completely different. I took my husband to a home I thought he would love to only get as far as the driveway before he said "why would show me that?"  At that point, I started previewing homes in advance.  I actually prepared and submitted offers on numerous homes to retract 2 or 3 days later.  Listening to and learning from my husband was the key. He was waiting for me to have a "WOW Love It" reaction and would get discouraged if I was less than enthusiastic.

Fights?-Yes Fights!  About things we never thought we would ever disagree about, much less have in the first year of marriage.  

Then it all hit me when, my Broker in Charge banned me from putting in another offer unless we were both ready and willing to go the distance.  I was so wrapped up in emotions as a buyer and a wife that I was unaware I was attempting career suicide.  My Broker in Charge said "you need to multi-task and separate being the agent from being the wife".  She said to me "look at it from the outside" -"as an agent, would you keep yourself as clients"? "Would you tolerate buyers submitting and withdrawn offers only to withdrawn and continue?"  My answer was an immediate NO! I wouldn't stand for the crazy, erratic behavior from buyers that fight every step of the way.  I would have cut loose clients like that months ago. What I learned is that, my husband and I needed to separate my job from our emotions and home buying plans as couple.

I started using with phrases like "As your agent this is my thought.... "Or he would ask "As my Wife what do you think...". Once we realized we needed to differentiate things calmed down.    Finally, we came up with an idea to individually score the houses. We ranked them individual desires.  We didn't talk about our individual scores until the end of the day.  If both of us did not score the house high - It was OUT, no questions.   When we sat down, looking at the scores and talking about what was really important to us picking a house was simple.

I have learned so much about my husband, my marriage, myself and how to be a more effective agent.  I am delighted to end Part 1 of my Newlywed Blog by saying we have went under contract (Yippee!) on our 1^st home together.  

 I will update everyone on the soon in Part 2 on the contract to closing process.

Until then enjoy your marriage

The End